Most brides plan out the logistics of their own getting ready schedule, leaving enough time for hair, makeup, getting into the dress, etc. However, many don’t think about how their friends and family might impact that schedule. Brides often have special people they want to have in those getting ready photos with them, like their mother, step mother, aunt, sister friends, etc.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had the mother of the bride spend the morning running around, working on the wedding setup and helping everyone else get ready. Then, the bride turns to her and says, “mom, come help me get my dress on,” and mom panics. Her dress isn’t steamed, her hair isn’t fixed, and she hasn’t had time to sit down and do her own makeup. Instead of being part of an important moment with her daughter, she opts to have someone else be a part of the prep for her. Sometimes, she uncomfortably joins in, feeling self conscious and knowing she’s not going to like the finished product. If the bride insists on waiting while she rushes into her dress clothes, the getting ready schedule goes off track.

How can you avoid putting your mom or another important person in this situation? The answer is planning, communication, and delegation. As you plan your getting ready timeline, specifically include the time when you’d like her dressed with hair and makeup done. Give her a solid buffer for running behind. Then, talk to her about being part of the getting ready pictures. Let her know that being part of those photos is the most important thing she can do at that time, and share the timeline you’ve prepared. In addition, consider enlisting other family members, friends, or a wedding planner to accomplish the tasks she might feel responsible for, so that she can focus on being present in the moment with you.